Some people think having twins would be fun and some think it would be a huge amount of work. They are both right. While I was excited, I didn’t know what to expect when having twins so I was worried about how overwhelming it might be.
In preparing for what to expect when having twins, we’ve discussed three signs you might be having twins (increased hCG level, more weight gain and fatigue) and discovered that WebMD lists additional things that might be exacerbated during twin pregnancies. Women expecting twins benefit from additional folic acid, suffer from more intense morning sickness, have spotting more often, and are at higher risk for gestational diabetes and preeclampsia. Overall, when expecting twins, you will see your doctor more often. Near the end, you should look ahead to a possible earlier delivery and you might need to have a c-section. Although it sounds daunting, it’s doable and, of course, not everyone experiences all these symptoms, so don’t be discouraged.
Once your twins are here, remember to ask for help. All newborn parents face nights with little sleep and adjustment to a newborn’s frequent needs, but having twins multiplies that exhaustion. Plan ahead and see if there is someone that can help you, at least for a little while. The good news is that if you plan to breastfeed, you can breastfeed both. You might even see some additional weight loss due to the extra work your body is doing.
Every new baby comes with an abundance of stuff like car seats, clothes, and diapers, among other things. And twins require more. However, initially, you can put both babies in the same crib, so that’s something. My boys liked being close and we kept them together for several months until they started rolling into each other.
I thought twin infancy was really difficult. My fraternal sons showed their individual personalities early and never seemed to get on the same schedule for very long. However, a good friend who has two sets of twins (yep, you read that right) dug in her heels and got her children on a schedule. She swears that is the only path to sanity with twins and many people agree. If you can do it, I think you will see great results (and I will applaud you).
Even though the first year is exhausting, they will be toddlers before you know it and it is a really fun, hilarious, crazy and loud time. What one doesn’t think of, the other will. It’s hard to know whether to laugh or be angry when they break something, trash a room or make a mess while eating. Some days I cried, some days I was barreled over laughing. You want to know what to expect when having twins? Expect excessive baby-proofing.
And then the tantrums came. It wasn’t unusual for me to be outnumbered by two unhappy boys. In the grocery store, car, kitchen floor – you name it. At the same time, it has been amazing to watch them grow at the same time, so alike and so different.
That has been the biggest challenge, I think. Having same sex twins is tough because while they are best friends, they are also competitors. How do you include both, while encouraging them to find their own interests? They have many of the same friends, so how do they find their own best friends (that aren’t each other)? How do you explain to one, when a common friend only asks the other to a playdate? And what do you say? My friend with boy/girl twins says they have naturally drifted toward their own sets of friends just by virtue of being different sexes.
My sons are now in kindergarten and in different classes. It’s the first time since birth they have been apart for a significant amount of time during the day. One was extremely nervous. He followed his brother everywhere and relied on him to do everything first. We weren’t sure about splitting them up, but he has adapted really well. He is doing well academically, has some new friends and it slowly gaining more and more confidence as an individual. One hurdle cleared. More to come.
Every set of twins is different, but every mother of twins I know loves to watch them together. My sons sit close to watch movies together, show each other their accomplishments first, and, yes, wrestle and fight. Often. Sometimes when I see them quietly hugging and encouraging each other I know that they will always share a strong bond. So yes, twins are a lot of work, but you also get double the hugs which is more than worth it.
RELATED QUESTIONS
Has anyone else ever have multiple dreams that you were having twins and it actually became true?
Has anyone having twins ever measured right on in early weeks? Or did you always measure big?
Mommas with twins — at what appointment did you find out you were having twins?
