Is this self soothing idea something real moms use, not just an idea I keep hearing about?! Just the thought of it kinda upsets me but if it works, it works!

J L 4 likes

Self soothing is a skill that babies develop as they get older. It's when a baby can calm themselves when upset, and no longer require your help to calm down.

J L 1 like

Some babies use sucking their thumbs, soothers, a favorite blanket, or toy...

Alicia R 3 likes

Unfortunately, we had to use the cry it out method to teach our daughter to self soothe. We tried EVERY no-cry method in the books and nothing worked. We did cry it out and after the first night she was going to bed on her own. It was tough but it was the best thing for all of us. She was finally a happy baby since she was finally getting good sleep and mommy and daddy were much happier too ;)

K M 1 like

How olds your baby? We did cry it out at 11 months

Renee W 0 likes

Alicia, how old was your LO? mine just seems to get pissed if I try to let him work it out on his own

Kfay V 1 like

Yes it is important for your baby to learn to self soothe. They usually will learn to suckle on their hand or fingers. The younger the better for this and it will be a daily lesson for your little one and you. It's hard, but if you know your baby isn't hungry or in need of a change then they should be fine. If they do cry for a long period of time their tummy maybe bothering them or the temperature as they maybe too hot or cold. You will learn to set a routine so you will know what to look for.

Marianne M 0 likes

Self soothe is a term coined in the 70s. It didn't exist before that. I loved this op-ed https://uncommonjohn.wordpress.com/2013/01/04/self-soothing-possibly-the-biggest-lie-ever-foisted-on-parents/

Tania T 1 like

Yes it's real. We used the cry it out method to teach our girl to self soothe. Which was the best thing we could have done( don't get me wrong it was hard for me to let her just cry I cried many times along with her in another room) but now there is times I ignore her tantrums and she self soothes in less then a min. She puts herself to sleep no need to be rocked or will play on her own which is awesome with the new bby due here in a few weeks

Michelle O 4 likes

I never used the cry it out method. But I did put my girls in their bed just before they actually fell asleep. Then they can learn to fall asleep in their bed and not in my arms. But, started this about 9 weeks old. Every child and parenting style are different though so find what works for you :-)

Ruth N 1 like

Self soothing is just a skill babies learn as they get older. They can start to calm themselves in different ways... Like hand/finger sucking etc. When people refer to self soothing it doesn't mean cry it out... Usually!

Ashley M 0 likes

It doesn't work and it's not the healthiest option for you or baby, please don't do it!

Crystal Q 0 likes

It actually does work (at least it did for my son) & no harm (I did my research & consulted with his pediatrician about that very topic) - we did a version of CIO starting at 3 months - we'd lay him down for naps or for the night when he was tired & ready to sleep, if he fussed we'd leave him be, if he cried we would give him a minute or so to calm himself down, if he was still upset after 2 minutes we would go in & soothe then leave the room, repeating if necessary

Aprilbaby 1 like

By saying that it upsets you I think you are assuming self sooth means cry it out?!? If that's true that's not the case. My baby can self soothe but I have never tried or used cry it out method. I did baby wise for sleep training but my LO has learned to use his lovey when he's not sleeping and alone to occupy himself and when he gets frustrated or upset he will rub the edges (it's muslin with ribbon edge) he will rub the edges til he tires or calms down. He never has been left to cry at all.

June G 0 likes

I used the cry it out method for both my children. I needed my husband there to reassure me that they were ok and it was best for them. So each time they cried I thought diaper clean, fed, warm but not to warm, they are ok. It worked, around the third day they were sleeping on their own. I also was able to differentiate between their cries. I could tell when they really needed something and when they were just being a little fussy.

K W 0 likes

Every kid is different. I didn't have to sleep train. I rocked her to sleep & then 1 night at about 3m she was fighting me so I laid her down & walked away out of frustration & she went to sleep. Most nights bed time means her sleep sack, sucky, white noise & I lay her down. Sometimes she will cry till I get to the living room & that's it. Self soothing is when she is doing something she doesn't want. Like she's on the floor playing and doesn't want to anymore. She will cry but calm herself.

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