I have a problem with my 5 year old. Her now former best friend punched her 3 times in the playground. They had a great relationship, about 4 weeks ago I noticed this girl was emotionally torturing my girl. She would say things like "we can have a play date only if your baby sis doesn't come" or "I don't want you to sit next to me today" Continues in comments

R S 0 likes

I told my lo that was not nice and to look for a different friend. We had playdates with other girls, etc. she cried some times telling me this girl keep telling her "today you can't play with me", since my lo seemed to do well with the other girls I thought peoblem solved until she came home to tell me "i will find anothe bf because she punched me today" Omg I talked to the teacher that addressed it the very ne t day

Katie F 0 likes

Not wanting a baby to come on a play date or not wanting her to sit by her isn't 'emotional torture' IMO. At 5 it is normal for a child to be friends, stop being friends, then be friends again. Did a teacher see your daughter being punched or did your daughter report this to you?

R S 1 like

To my surprise the girls momsaid: well my girl keeps telling her (to my LO) that she doesn't want to play with her but she follows her around like "play with me, play with me" Of course it doesn't justify the punching (which she didn't even apologized for). I talked to my LO and the teacher and we all agreed the best thing was to not let them be together for a few days Long and behold there is no way to separate them now

R S 0 likes

Im worried, my LO keeps telling me "but she said she was sorry and now she likes me" and keeps following this girl and calling her her BF Granted we moved to this area and this was the first friend she made Please help!!! I don't know what to do The teacher also told me this girl is very manipulative and uses her hands not words to fixthings

Katie F 0 likes

I think it is important for your daughter to work it out herself, as long as the girl is not getting physical with her and the behavior is not rising to a 'bully' level. It's how children develop social skills. All of this sounds entirely normal behavior for five year olds.

R S 0 likes

Katie my LO told me I know this girl also arbitrarily excludes my LO from games, and talkes to other girls about doing it too, then she comes and acts like she loves her and as soon as my girl gets close again she pushes her away until she makes her cry

Danie M 1 like

I understand completely, my daughter is 10 and that kind of thing is constantly happening, it sucks and I feel so sad for her, happens every school year but with different kids, she was depressed over it, the beginning of this year I taught her how to flip it.. Like, if a girl is making faces at her I told her to laugh or if someone says I don't want to be friends to say, ok with a smile.. It gave her tons of confidence and it no longer makes her upset

R S 0 likes

What about letting her still be "friends" with this girl even though she punched her 3 times in the chest, that is what worries me

Danie M 1 like

My daughter was the same with her one friend, the girl was so mean to her but she kept going back to being friends with her and it was like a cycle of heartbreak over and over again, personally I'd try to keep them apart if possible

Katie F 0 likes

When you say punched do you mean she had bruises? Kids hit each other all the time. Idk how you prevent them from being friends? Do you tell your daughter not to let her sit by her? Bc wouldn't that be the same behavior that is 'emotionally torturing' your little girl?

Katie F 0 likes

I could see potentially encouraging your daughter to have/make other friends. Invite other friends over on a play date ect. And FYI my advice is much different for a five year old then it would be a 10 or 11 year old. The social dynamics of a five year old are just much different.

Danie M 0 likes

(If you're referring to my advice). It started when my daughter was 5, what I wrote was what she went through at that age

Katie F 0 likes

No, I wasn't referring to your advice.

Katie F 0 likes

I was referring to the fact that if be worried about a 10 year old punching another 10 year old. 5 year olds hitting each other is not abnormal. They are still impulsive, and learning there limits.

R S 0 likes

Katie I disagree. My daughter knows that you never use your hands, of course every kid is different but I can't say "well to bad it us ok for someone to hit you" or wait until she has marks This has not happened with any other kids I mean my lo has never been hit or anything like that by other kids

R S 0 likes

Danielle Im reading a great book "little girls can be mean" i recommend it

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