How to Tell Someone You Are Pregnancy - SmartMom

How to Tell Someone You Are Pregnant (Even If It Was Unplanned)

Getting pregnant is a big deal.  And telling people can be super hard, so you might wonder how to tell someone you are pregnant. For some people, that little plus sign on the pregnancy test is met with panic, while for others, it’s the most breathtaking plus sign their eyes have ever beheld.  Whether or not your pregnancy was planned, finding out about it brings on some major emotions because this, my friend, tops all major events you have had or will have.

Given the gravity of the news, it’s important to know how you’re going to break it to the people in your life.  Will you opt for something gloriously cheesy like putting a sourdough bun inside the oven and telling your family to go look inside? Or does news like this require a tough conversation?  Either way, we’ve got you covered.

Call the Caterers! Set Up the Fireworks! We’ve Got Good News!

You’ve planned it all out.  You’ve been trying for what feels like forever and finally, it happened.  You’re pregnant!  When you tell people is a completely personal decision.  Some people wait until the 12-week-mark or until they hear a heartbeat at the doctor’s office, because once you’re past that point, chances of miscarriage drop down to a scrawny 5%, but others want to share their joy immediately, and that’s great too.

So, to share news of your growing family with people who are likely to react by buying diapers and pack-n-plays and Bumbos and Boppies in a manic glee-spree, you might want to share the news in a fun/creative way.  Thanks to internet people, there are bazillions of ideas out there to choose from if you don’t have an idea of your own.

Here are a few good ones…

  • Gifts!  Wrap up customized t-shirts for the family members you’re telling and have them open the gifts at the same time – each shirt with the family member’s new title printed on the front – “Grandma!”“Auntie Lulu!”“Grannie Boppowitz!”
  • THE stick.  For those you’re really close to, it’s always fun to show up at someone’s door with a positive pregnancy stick and see their face go from “YAY!”to “EW! Did you wash this first?”
  • If this isn’t your first, dress your older child in a “Big Brother”or “Big Sister”shirt and just let people figure it out.  Or, you could just put the shirt on your dog.  That works too.
  • Post a Facebook picture of your feet with a pair of little infant shoes at the end of the line. (Yes, this has been done a lot, but it’s so adorable!)
  • Show up at someone’s house with pickles and ice cream in hand.  Wait for it…
  • Take a picture in front of one of those road signs that says “Bump ahead.”
  • Send them a link to this article and say, “By the way, this is how I’m telling you.”

When the News Doesn’t Come Easy

There are many circumstances when news of a baby might be difficult to get out.  Maybe you’re very young.  Maybe the father isn’t going to stick around. You know the scenarios.  I can tell you this, though.  Although news like this isn’t always met with squeals and hugs, time heals the shock and babies are so precious and perfect, even the strongest of sour faces doesn’t stand a chance of staying that way long, once they catch a glimpse of those perfect plump cheeks.  It’s important to be prepared for this conversation.  It’s important to be sensitive.

News like this affects not only you, but everyone in your support system.  So, be sure to enter the conversation with a humble and gracious attitude .  Then, remember to take a deep breath, relax, and know that no matter how your people receive this news, you are the mom and their reactions will pass with their shock and when it’s all said and done and you’re holding your baby for the first time, none of the naysayers will matter anymore.

Once you’re ready, here are some tips.

  • Don’t beat around the bush.  Spit it out and allow who you’re telling time to react and process the information before you say anything else.
  • Be clear and confident about the future.  If you will be needing help from the people you’re telling, tell them what you plan on doing and what you’ll need from them, gently and graciously.  Have your speech set in your mind so a negative facial expression won’t freeze you up.
  • Try to brush off any negativity you receive from others as best as you can.  Even when babies come into the world under difficult circumstances, each one is a treasure.  And, the sooner you can get past circumstances that are less than ideal, the sooner you can focus on enjoying the miracle you’re carrying around.

Whatever your situation may be, once you get past these conversations, you can fully focus on the thrilling nesting process – getting yourself and home ready for your new little buttercup.


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About Scarlet Hiltibidal

Scarlet has written for and managed various publications - her articles reaching over 38 million readers. She has a degree in counseling and worked as a 4th grade teacher before entering the media realm. Currently, she writes for Smart Mom and is also writing children's curriculum for a church in Miami. Her favorite things to do are tell her husband every thought that crosses her mind, play with her two little girls, and connect with other moms on the SmartMom app! Visit her blog at and follow her on Twitter @ScarletEH.